OMETOTCHTLI

[soulping]

[You're wading in a low river, trying to advance as fast as you can--is the apparent setup, anyways. There's a table in the center of the room with a die to roll--and as you do so the world moves around you like some kind of VR deal. Everything looks, smells, and even sounds real… but it can't actually hurt you.]

[A monitor is lit up on the table. It reads: '24 spaces remain.']

Comments

ROUND 1

[soulping]

Re: ROUND 1

[rednecking]

[why is it about romance]

Who wants to roll first?

Re: ROUND 1

[foulhussy]

I guess anybody's fine. I'll go.

[She rolls. And gets a 4.]

OBSTACLE: CYBER SHARK IMPACT

[fangirlitis]

[20 spaces remain]

[As you wade through the river waters towards the other bank (and your true love!), you see an ominous fin in the river swimming towards you. It jumps from the water, revealing a terrifying Cyber Shark coming right for you! There's not much time to act--what do you do?]

> Punch it in the nose
> Play dead
> Attempt to surf
> Run away
> Break into a killer guitar solo

Discuss

[fangirlitis]

Re: Discuss

[foulhussy]

...What the hell is this?

Whatever, it's just a fish, let's kick it's ass. Or nose.

Re: Discuss

[rednecking]

What the hell.

. . . sure, let's punch the damn thing.

Re: Discuss

[redatheart]

[...what is this]

I suppose.

Re: Discuss

[rednecking]

Aww, take your judge-y face off.

Re: Discuss

[redatheart]

[WHAT IF HE DOESN'T}

Re: Discuss

[rednecking]

[THEN YOU SUCK AND THAT'S SAD]

Re: OBSTACLE: CYBER SHARK IMPACT

[foulhussy]

We're punching this stupid fish.

RESULT

[fangirlitis]

[You punch the shark in the nose, and wind up jarring your hand because its nose is metal as hell, much like anything to do with sharks. It bites all of you on the bum. Go back 3 spaces.]

Re: Discuss

[redatheart]

In any event, I'm not sure it's any less sensible than the rest of the options.

[also no u]

ROUND 2

[fangirlitis]

[23 spaces remain]

Re: RESULT

[foulhussy]

Oh, fuck off!

Re: RESULT

[redatheart]

[WHOOPS]

Re: ROUND 2

[foulhussy]

Why do we have to have such shitty luck?

Re: RESULT

[rednecking]

Son of a bitch.

Re: ROUND 2

[rednecking]

I'd really like to know the answer to that too.

Re: ROUND 2

[foulhussy]

Someone else roll this turn.

Re: ROUND 2

[rednecking]

I'll do it.

[grumble grumble he rolls a 3]

OBSTACLE: RIVER RAPIDS

[fangirlitis]

[20 spaces remain]

[What's a river without rapids? The water rushes faster in this part of the river, beating against rocks and swirling in a chaotic pattern of white rapids and swift currents. It ends a short distance ahead, but getting through it unscathed might be hard. Since you left your white water gear at home--what do you do?]

> Slow down and proceed carefully
> Try to rush through using the rapids as leverage
> Don't change your pace at all
> Run away
> Break into a killer guitar solo

Discuss

[fangirlitis]

Re: Discuss

[redatheart]

Perhaps we should take a more conservative option this time.