The things that I want... that I wish for... ultimately, they're not very grand. I want my friends to be happy and live long lives. I want to be a part of those lives. Even if my future isn't very good, or destined for great things.... I hope that it's one filled with love, and in the end, I can look back and feel unashamed of.
...
Just simple things, the kind of thing that anybody wants.
... Actually, if things had been a little different... this place's shape would have been much different too. But I think this is fine as well. I still have a lot of room to grow.
The world... and myself... we both had limitless potential. I could be anything I wanted to be, do anything I wanted to do. The more people I met, the more I felt that I could grow. I wasn't really aware that I didn't know what I wanted to be, or do, but even though that was sort of how I felt, it was still okay, because nothing felt closed off to me, and I felt strong. Even if it was going to be a lot of hard work to get wherever I was going--I had the strength, and people behind me who believed in me.
[ as she speaks, behind her, at the window, the light starts to brighten as she speaks, and her own form seems to become a little shaky and misty at the edges, and she gains a sort of... translucent quality, as the light runs through her, lighting her up inside out. if at first it seems alarming, it should be dampened down by a heady feeling of rightness ]
[ however, it doesn't last. the levels of light begin to fade out from its ultra brightness, and her body returns gradually to its normal state. ]
But then a lot of things happened. I made mistakes. It felt like... people lost faith in me. So I started to falter. I started to lose confidence in myself, my strength, and my potential. Things got a little darker, and I felt like... I had to settle.
I lost my way, a little. I got too wrapped up in all my regrets and indecision and... couldn't focus on the things that mattered, or the good advice I'd received.
It's a lot better now. You all believed in me and forgave me and cared about me when I needed it the most, and that was what I feared I'd lost. But... there's still some problems I'm going to have to deal with, with my own two fists.
[ and as such, there's still plenty of light in this room--a comfortable level. with a feeling of ... potential. ]
But as long as I keep all that in heart--the belief that you all had in me here, and my own strength.... Well, winter's not forever, and someday, it's going to be spring again. I just have to keep working hard until then, making lots of light and melting out the snow.
[ at this moment, natalie's cat is going to come walking in from a cat door to the left. it comes over and leaps on top of the table, as though it was meant to be there--but some things have changed about it. aside from the change in attitude, gone is the indecisively teal collar: she now sports a brand new collar, magenta in color, and new tags. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ ]
[she's listening so intently that she doesn't notice the cat initially, not until it jumps onto the table. she leans over to read the collar, smiling despite herself]
I think you're more than capable of making enough light to melt any snow that comes up. I wasn't kidding, what I said a while ago... You really are one of the kindest people I've met.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Re: TRUE HEART
Yeah, yeah. Let's not get too sappy, here.
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Is there anything you want to know? Or... a request you want to make of me? It's the very least I can do, considering.
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You must really love this room.
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/3
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...
Just simple things, the kind of thing that anybody wants.
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/4
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[ as she speaks, behind her, at the window, the light starts to brighten as she speaks, and her own form seems to become a little shaky and misty at the edges, and she gains a sort of... translucent quality, as the light runs through her, lighting her up inside out. if at first it seems alarming, it should be dampened down by a heady feeling of rightness ]
/5 i lied
But then a lot of things happened. I made mistakes. It felt like... people lost faith in me. So I started to falter. I started to lose confidence in myself, my strength, and my potential. Things got a little darker, and I felt like... I had to settle.
Re: TRUE HEART
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[ and as such, there's still plenty of light in this room--a comfortable level. with a feeling of ... potential. ]
But as long as I keep all that in heart--the belief that you all had in me here, and my own strength.... Well, winter's not forever, and someday, it's going to be spring again. I just have to keep working hard until then, making lots of light and melting out the snow.
[ at this moment, natalie's cat is going to come walking in from a cat door to the left. it comes over and leaps on top of the table, as though it was meant to be there--but some things have changed about it. aside from the change in attitude, gone is the indecisively teal collar: she now sports a brand new collar, magenta in color, and new tags. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ ]
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...Man, you're gonna make me cry again. Hey, Roc?
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Mm? Yeah, Natalie?
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[ the room feels cozy and warm now; you probably don't need the blanket anymore to be honest ]
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[taking a sip of hot chocolate]
Is there anything else you want to ask me or tell me or anything?
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