ALECTRYON '''ASS'''ETS

[soulping]

[ A small team-coloured building awaits in front of you, ready for you to assume direct control! Can your business withstand the turbulent waters of capitalism? ]

Comments

[lifehacker]

He looks like he got a dildo lost in his ass a long time ago.

But if he wants to do caskets, sure. Real... not morbid.

[notsuperman]

...That's a image I really don't want to have.

But he's got a point, people always need to bury people...

[lifehacker]

We could even do funeral catering on the side.

[notsuperman]

Now that's an interesting side-business.

[lifehacker]

Discounted meat dishes.

Wonder where the meat comes from.

[notsuperman]

Unsuspecting cannibalism...

Hey, what they don't know can't hurt them.

[lifehacker]

This turned from grim to straight-up fucked up. I'm lovin' it.

[notsuperman]

Seems to be the theme of this place. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. And then horrify the crap out of them.

[lifehacker]

Alright, well. We'll start out with the caskets. Gonna need craftsmen, for sure.

[notsuperman]

[ Nodding. ]

Craftsmen, workers, and administrators to keep them in line.

[lifehacker]

Yep. Do we need advertisement? How the hell are you gonna dress this up?

[notsuperman]

Your loved one is important to you, and you want them to rest in peace.

With Alectryon-brand premium caskets, we can ensure that their eternal slumber is a comfortable one.

Alectryon: the best choice for your dead uncle.

[lifehacker]

You're hired.

[notsuperman]

And that wasn't even my best material.